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SuperRally sounds way better than Performance Rally.
SupaRally (pronounced soo-PAH-rally) sounds even better.
Better yet, SupaDupaRally! Now that would be waayyy cool.
Who wants to go drifting when you can go SupaDupaRally?
Sheeeyit!
We have thems kids linin' up round da block ta do da SupaDupa!
 

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164 Posts
>We now see that the evolution of the sport is as such:
>
>rally....performance rally....super rally....supaduparally

Yep! You got it!

But dude, check this out.
See, it's like, way back in the stone age, when JVL started rallying, they drove about a thousand miles in 2 day, and the entrance fees were only, like, a dollar, dude. Ok, maybe a buck-fifty.
But, like how much does it cost to enter a rally now? Ya know, I heard from my friend's sister's stepson-in-law that the race out by Olympia this weekend cost like about $450, dude! And those dudes only get to drive maybe a hundred miles, ya know brah? And that's like a cheap race dude. Man there's like these dudes that drive all over the country, to maybe like 10 or 12 races a year, and each race costs like a thousand dollars just to enter! Can you like believe that dude? Talk about blowin a wad man! HaHA! That's like hella dough, brah! Them dudes gotta be sporting some blingity-bling, know what I mean, dude?
But now check this out man. With this new SupaRally thing, it's like you get two small races for the price of one big race. No man, not the old-skool type big race, but like the new style "big" race. Ya, that's right, the kind where these bling-bling dudes are takin two whole days to drive as far as my man Jake here can drive in an hour, maybe an hour and a half on some really twisty roads. But these dudes are talking bout this SupaRally thing, where, like if they break down or somethin on the first day, them they get to go again on the second day. Can you believe that man? The blingity-bling crew is like totally tryin ta rewrite the rules so just in case their $50,000 racecar can't do the first 50 miles, then they get to try again the next day! Awww.. I think somebody needs a hug... BWHAHAHAHAHA!!!
But see, this new SupaDupaRally thing I'm talkin bout just cuts right through all that noise man. Check this oout dawg.
First of all, entrance fees are like about a hundred thousand dollars. Then, ya get like a football stadium, see, and ya pile a bunch of dirt in it, ya know with, like bulldozers and dumptrucks, right? And ya make like jumps and hairpin turns and stuff like that right? And ya charge like 10 or 20 bucks for people to watch, right, so your not charging as much as like, Ozzfest, but definitely more than a, um, ya know that band from DC that only charges like five bucks, um, I forgot their name but you know who I talking bout, right? Anyway, so ya got this football stadium full of people at like 20 bucks a head and they're watching these, like million dollar cars just gettin karayzee off these jumps and berms like mad, ya know dawg. I'm tellin ya it's like totally SICK brah!

But ya know, I'm sittin here, thinkin, man, I ain't got no million dollars, or no hundred g's ta throw around just ta fly off a few jumps or carve a few berms. I just wanna drive my car in the woods. Maybe see, compare myself with the other dudes drivin their cars in the woods, so we can say, dude, I was kickin yer bootay today, or ya know whatever. Yea, that's what I want. Just drive my car like a monkey with a typewriter, man, ya know know what I mean?



PS, man dude homie g, it was like so totally freakin hard to stay in character for this one man. I had to be sooo careful with the cursewords, like fo real!

PPS It's the wine. And the 10 hour workday.}>
 
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